Chapter 7 To remain his one and only woman
“The position he wants you to be” once you get it is not forever.
First, the position has changed for the worse. Riley’s story Please read it.
Riley’s story: Changing “his desired position”
Riley and him have been dating for a year and a half. When we first started dating, he wanted to meet up with me almost every week, and every time we met, he started looking at Riley. “Cute” “I love you” “I want to marry you “I was praising him.
We were very much in love until we started dating for about 3 months, and we never fought. However, as time passed, Riley Express your dissatisfaction and anxiety to him and call him out. I started doing this. When Riley behaves in a bad mood, he also gets irritated, and things break between them. fight has been increasing.
At first he “I want to get married early.”([Second position]) However, by the time half a year has passed, “There’s no need to rush into marriage. “Changed to ([3rd position]).
By the time a year had passed and we had repeated fights…“I don’t want to get married, but I don’t know if I really want to get married.”([4th position]).
💡 hisThe temperature of love is gradually decreasingI did it.
his feelings keep changing
[The position he wants you to be] whether it’s right after he asks you to date, the month after he proposes, or even after marriage.Subject to change.
this isdietSimilar to For example, let’s say you have achieved your goal weight through exercise and dietary restrictions, and have achieved your ideal figure.
But after thatWhat if I stopped exercising and started eating whatever I wanted?
💡 It will return to its original shape in no time.
In other words, dieting does not end once you reach your goal;Efforts to maintain that figureis necessary. The same goes for love. In order to maintain relationships, it is important to continue making small efforts on a daily basis.is.
To remain his one and only woman…
✅ Are you able to maintain the distance he wants?
✅ Do you respect his sense of time and try to meet him when he wants to see you?
✅ Do you respect his values?
✅ Are you doing things that will make him think, “I really want to cherish you,” and “You are more important than any other woman?”
💡 By having these awareness, you can get closer to his “unique existence”!
Two essential elements for a happy relationship
For a happy love,two essential elementsThere is. If one of these two is missing,Romantic relationships are more likely to failProbably.
1. “Who do you choose?”
This is a very important element, but for some reason many women do not“What’s wrong with me?” “How can we get along?” “How can I get rid of this anxiety?” I worry about this and tend to lose track of my thoughts.
💡 But the important thing is “who do you choose?”
There’s no need to blame yourself!
💬 “If only I were prettier…”
💬 “Maybe it doesn’t work out because I’m lacking something…?”
Many women blame themselves,That’s not true!
For example… if you…A woman who is gentle and beautiful like an angel, has great style, is fun to be with, and has no flaws whatsoever. Suppose it was.
but,What if he was like this?
❌ lie ❌ gambling addiction ❌ flirtatiousness ❌ I have a spending habit and am in debt.
💡 No matter how perfect a woman is, relationships still don’t work out, right?
That’s why,“Who do you choose?” is important.
It is important to choose a man who has the qualities!
💡 A “qualified man” does not mean a “perfect man.”
Humans are imperfect, butChoose someone who doesn’t have qualities you can never tolerate. is important.
for example…
✅ If you can’t forgive a lie,Choose someone who won’t lie
✅ If you can’t tolerate gambling,Choose someone who doesn’t gamble
✅ If you can’t tolerate cheating,Choose someone who won’t cheat
✅ If you can’t tolerate waste,choose someone who is financially sound
💡 Even if you like his looks or his social status,Don’t choose someone who has unacceptable qualities!
A love affair with a man who has an unforgivable nature becomes painful…
💬 If he has “absolutely unforgivable characteristics”,I express my anxiety and dissatisfaction because I want things to improve. Most are women.
💬 Then,His romance temperature drops and the relationship deteriorates.I will continue to do so.
What if… 💬 Even if you begged him to get rid of his unforgivable traits, and he temporarily improved…? ❌Habits and dependencies do not change easily and often return to their original nature.
❌ By accusing him of “I promised!”, his love temperature drops further.
💡 That’s why “who you choose” is an essential element of a happy love!
To make a happy love come true
✨ How do you use your “life time”? ✨ Instead of blaming yourself, it is important to choose someone who can make your love life a happy one!
💡 I hope you find a truly happy love life.
How to determine the man you should choose
Examples of consultants
💬 「Isn’t he the man to choose? He doesn’t have the “cheating personality”, which is an important element for me. However, there are a lot of fights, and to be honest, I’m always feeling uneasy. I’m not sure if I can continue dating like this. I can’t decide whether he is the right person for me to choose for a happy relationship. ”
It’s difficult to make calm decisions because you have feelings of love!
💡 One of the essential elements of a happy relationship is “who to choose.” However, when you have feelings of love, it becomes difficult to make calm decisions.
So, how can you tell if the guy you like falls under the category of “the man you should choose”?
I will tell you a very simple way to find out.
Let’s ask ourselves!
Do you often think of him when you’re alone, or feel this way when you’re with him?
✅ You can be “the person you like”
✅ Makes you feel warm
💡 What is “your favorite self”? It refers to how you wish to be, or how you feel that you like who you are now.
for example…
- I feel warm and full of happiness
- I feel kind
- I am so grateful to him
- I’m so happy that I can’t help but smile
💡 If you often experience this kind of feeling, then you can say that he is the person with whom “your happy love” is likely to come true!
On the contrary…
If you often feel like this, you need to be careful.
❌ I feel anxious and restless ❌ I become suspicious ❌ I get irritated ❌ I feel sad at the slightest thing ❌ I feel like “I don’t like myself like this…”
💡 If you often experience negative emotions like this, he may be the person with whom it is difficult for you to have a happy relationship.
What if both are equally applicable?
💡 Let’s think about whether the “reasons why you tend to feel negative” can be solved!
for example…
✅ If the problem seems like it can be solved, it is easier to improve the relationship.
✅ If the problem is likely to continue, the future relationship is likely to become unstable.
If your negative feelings are caused by some problem, resolving that problem will help improve your relationship.
Example: Temporary anxiety due to his job change activities
If he is looking for a job change,
✅ They don’t want to meet you because they’re busy or feel depressed.
✅ I keep thinking during the date
✅ Even though I’m with you, I don’t seem happy
If this is the case…
💡 You may find it easier to feel negative when you think of him.
However, he succeeded in changing jobs,
✅ Will start asking you out on a date
✅ Focuses on the two of you during the date
✅ Go back to looking happy
💡 With these changes, your negative feelings will decrease and your relationships will improve!
Note: The cause may be your own love habits!
If you have had a lot of negative feelings towards all of your past lovers, there is a possibility that you are the cause.
For example… ❌ “I tend to interpret things negatively” ❌ “I expect too much from him”
💡 By correcting these love habits, it will be easier to understand whether or not he is the man you should choose!
For a happy love…
💡 “Who to choose” is one of the most important factors in having a happy relationship. If you can determine whether he is the man you should choose, you will be able to have a happier love!
✅ Can you be the person you like? ✅ Do you often feel “warm”? ✅ Are negative feelings temporary? ✅ Can you solve the problem?
💡 Keeping these things in mind, let’s identify the person with whom you can have a truly happy relationship!
2. Control your emotions
Being able to control your emotions towards him is an important factor in having a happy relationship. This is directly related to how comfortable you are with him.
If you can’t control your emotions, your love temperature will drop…
✅ “Massage frequency has decreased”
✅ “He didn’t remember what I said.”
✅ “I’m worried about women being at his hobby gathering.”
If you keep criticizing him or complaining due to this anxiety… 💡 His love temperature will drop.
Even if he is kind, gentle, and generous, he will feel uncomfortable if you can’t control your emotions.
Uncomfortability lowers the love temperature!
When he feels uncomfortable…
❌ “I no longer want to see you” ❌ “I no longer want to cherish you”
In this way, his love interest gradually decreases.
You sense that his feelings have changed, and you become even more anxious… 💡 You move away from a happy love life.
Remember that controlling your emotions is essential for a long-term happy relationship!
Could that anger be “fake”?
Example: Annoyed by his lateness
Today is my date with my favorite guy! However…💬 He was an hour late than the appointed time. The time we could spend together decreased, and you complained in a strong tone, “Why didn’t you get up and get ready in time?”
💡 Do you have any experience like this?
In fact, there is a high possibility that this anger is “fake.”
What is the true nature of anger?
In most cases, the feelings of anger that we feel in love are not “real anger.” They are just pretending to be angry while wearing a mask of anger.
If you find yourself thinking, “If it’s not anger, then what is?”, please think about it for a moment. When was the last time you felt angry or upset with him?
Emotional flow (example of his being late)
1️⃣ He was an hour late, so our time together was cut short.
2️⃣ It’s sad that he seems to be disrespecting me.
3️⃣ You doubt and feel anxious, “Don’t you want to be with me for as long as possible?”
4️⃣ I feel lonely because I feel like maybe he doesn’t love me that much.
5️⃣ Ego is born when the expectations of “I want to be loved and cherished” are not fulfilled.
6️⃣ My feeling of “I want to do what I want with him!” becomes stronger.
7️⃣ Sadness and loneliness are converted into anger.
Why does it turn into anger?
Humans are creatures that don’t want to get hurt.
💡 Rather than accepting sadness and loneliness as they are, converting them into anger will protect your heart. That’s why the moment you feel sadness, you turn it into anger and say, “I’m annoyed!”
But… 💡 If you take out your emotions as anger on him, it will only lead to a fight.
❌ “Do I just have to put up with it and not say anything?” → No, that’s not the case!
Be aware of your loneliness and express it instead of anger!
💡 The key is to be able to realize that “this feeling isn’t anger, it’s just that I’m lonely”!
❌ By not converting it into anger, you will be able to express it in a more appropriate way.
For example… ✅ “I’m a little sad because the date I was looking forward to was cut short.” ✅ “I thought we’d get to see each other for the first time in a while, so I wanted to spend more time with you.”
In this way, by conveying your honest feelings instead of anger, your relationship with him will become smoother!
If you can feel better without complaining, that’s best. 💡 However, if you really want to convey your feelings, be conscious of not turning it into anger!
Controlling your emotions is the key to a happy relationship!
❌ If you take it out on him as anger, the love temperature will drop.
✅ Being aware of your feelings and communicating them correctly will deepen your relationship.
💡 “Sadness and loneliness do not turn into anger.” By acquiring this habit, you can maintain a happy love life for a long time!
Realizing “happy love between two people” by making full use of love profiling
It is very important to love profile him and analyze him.
💡 How to become the “one and only woman for him” and 💡 make him think “I never want to let him go”?
If you have a “strategy book specifically for him” that contains the answers, you won’t have to worry about how to act.
“I understand him as if I were my own.”
If it’s about you… ✅ What would make you happy? ✅ How do you want to be treated when you are sad?
You can see that, right?
💡 Being able to understand him as if he were your own is the key to a happy relationship!
It is important to make full use of love profiling, analyze him to the best of your ability, empathize with his values, and be close to him.
And she can become his ideal woman.
You may try it consciously at first, but as you continue, it will become a habit.
By being conscious of his comfort…
- “He feels happy.”
- “He values me more.”
💡 These feelings will come naturally!
Even if you don’t unconsciously become “his ideal woman,” he feels comfortable,
💬 “There is no one who understands me like this. I’m happy when I’m with you.”
My love for you deepens even more.
Then, you will feel even more happy, and you will start thinking, 💡 “I want to cherish him even more!”
You can become “the one and only” for him and get closer to 💡 the “woman who can make him the happiest in the world”!
to love him
What does “loving him” mean to you?
I believe that “protecting his heart” is true love.
✅ Protect your heart so that he can be the happiest person in the world.
✅ Even when he is in despair, be someone he can consider to be the best ally and understanding person in the world.
💡 Isn’t this what true love is?
Important things to protect his heart
💡 Decide that you will never hurt him.
in particular…
✅ Don’t do anything you don’t want done to you.
✅ Don’t do anything awkward if he finds out.
Everyone sometimes acts without being aware of it. for example…
💬 I received a Masseage from my ex-boyfriend for the first time in a while, and I replied with a lighthearted feeling. 💬 I get so irritated with him that I end up complaining about him to a mutual friend.
These are common everyday occurrences, but are they really necessary?
Decide what not to do
💡 What if he was in touch with his ex-girlfriend without you knowing? 💡 What if you talked about your complaints and complaints to a mutual friend?
You may feel sad and heavy.
Consciously choose “actions that don’t hurt”
💡 It is important to decide that you will never hurt him and act accordingly!
✅ Become “someone who will never betray you”
✅ “I’ll always be on his side”
By maintaining this awareness, you can become someone who can protect his heart.
Be a “mental support” for him
If he…
💬 “It’s so painful that I want to die.”
💬 “I despaired of the world.”
💬 “I started hating myself.”
Even in times like these, if you are “the best ally and understanding person in the world, and someone who will never betray you,” you can become a warm light for him.
It doesn’t have to be that big of a deal.
for example…
💬 When he makes a mistake at work and is feeling down, he can do his best because you believe in him.
💬 When he feels stressed and wants to run away, you’ll be there for him so he doesn’t have to give up.
💡 The accumulation of these small actions will lead to protecting his heart.
To make your “happy love” come true for him.
💡 Understand the values that he values more than anyone else, cherish him from the bottom of your heart, and continue to be someone you can trust from the bottom of your heart.
✨ This is a “happy love between two people” that makes full use of love profiling!
💡 I sincerely hope that you find a “happy love” with the important person you want to spend your life with.